Author: Angel

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bouncing back

Yes, neglect can happen from time to time. Mostly from unexpected circumstances. You get hit and go down with the punch. You feel the cold floor pressing against your back – you want to get up but you can’t, not just yet. You need to heal. You fight it. You need to heal. Time stops for a moment and you find yourself in a quasi existential weightlessness of some sort. This is not a strange reverie. You lift your head, begin to rise. You can’t run yet, you’re learning to walk once again. One step at time you come to grips with the fact that it wont be the same; it cannot, must not be the same.

Back on your feet sort of speak. The world is a new. A new path lies ahead. Get walking.

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in the light

You step away for a minute or two, this turns into hours, weeks, months.   The light becomes dimmer and dimmer until there is no more.  You feel overwhelmed by the darkness that appears to consume you.  But then you realize, darkness didn’t enter, light is what’s missing.  The Light.

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

Even in the absence of light, praise.  Praise.  Always praise.

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a year later…

It’s been a bit over one year (and a five months since our last post).  It’s safe to say that quite a lot has happened.  A few unexpected turn of events which threw our world into disarray – our own personal chaos front and center.  Our faith was tested, our patience felt like it was depleted but one thing grew:  our love.  Yes, you may be rolling your eyes as you read this and chalk it up to us still being the “honeymoon phase” but you’d be surprised as how our experience has been nowhere close to the bliss most newlyweds enjoy.  At times it feels like we hit the ground running.  As soon as we got back from our get-a-way it’s been non stop.  But I digress… Continue reading “a year later…”

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2017 and the struggle for healthy living

Let’s face it, I love food!  I throughly enjoy the eating experience; discovering new flavors, textures, techniques, rediscovering old favorites, re-inventions of classics and so on.  With the exception of a few restrictions, there isn’t a dish I wont be willing to try.  It truly is one of the simply joys of life the wife and I treasure.  We can have an amazing experience from pennies on the dollar to a little more than the average American spends on dinner every week.  Up to this point the journey has been a fulfilling one.

Continue reading “2017 and the struggle for healthy living”

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in support of making the bed

Leaving my bed undone in the morning after waking up was my pièces de résistance; it was proof that I was an adult – or so I thought.

Doing any type of activity in the morning is a chore.  Just getting out of bed is a battle in itself and I tend to allow my mind to slowly warm up to the idea and it has to get going.  But how can I force myself to “do stuff” so early the morning?  That’s where some mind trickery comes into play.

The one thing which cemented by passage into independence will now help bride the gap between apathy and productivity.  How so you may ask?  I’m a creature of habit and it takes some work in order to break the patterns previously established.  Over the years I’ve come to realize that small changes yield the best results when trying to change course; once the first step is taken we keep building on that progress.  But, you’re just making the bed, you may say.  Well my friends, small steps.  Steps that will hopefully help me change my perspective and break the habit.  Plus, making the bed will please the wife.

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four years ago

Four years ago little did I realize that such a quotidian question as “Do you like classical music?” wold my life forever change.  I was staring into the abyss my life was at the time only to find my own fears staring right back.  It’s hard to imagine where Id’ be right now if those words were not sent.  Would I be drifting through the dross my life was back then?  Would I be completely removed from the world, ignorant of my own demise?

Four years ago my heart was a cold as a the desert floor in mid November.  Tired, beaten and hopeless with no desire to ever feel loved again. Would my heart be as closed off (or worse) to any attempt at love and companionship if that question had not been asked?  Would I continue living in fear, fending off any potential suitor?

Continue reading “four years ago”